Today, I want to talk about overwhelm…
It’s a topic that’s coming up a lot in my conversations with clients around work and family right now, so I’m guessing it might be coming up for you, as well…
We have a lot going on in the 21st Century. SO many things to do and read and listen to. So much to worry about…. This increases the chances that we’re going to feel overwhelmed BUT it doesn’t make it inevitable.
In fact, you have a lot of control over your overwhelm.
To exercise more of the control you DO have, start by noticing what you’re blaming your overwhelm on.
It’s not a demanding job or small kids or your own business that make you feel overwhelmed ALL the time.
Yes, it’s totally normal to feel overwhelm from those things SOMETIMES.
But feeling it ALL the time indicates that you’re making choices that tend to create overwhelm instead of reduce it….
You probably have some well meaning reasons behind that, so no judgement intended.
Here’s what you might be doing to create overwhelm for yourself
Constant overwhelm happens when you:
- Take on too much because you don’t want to let anyone down (& feel guilty saying no)
- Decide to overschedule yourself and so you run frantically from event to event, often running late and with no buffer time to catch up or reflect constructively on what you’re doing
- Obsess about getting every detail of your email right before sending it (& so you spend 10x more time on it than you expected)
- Are consistently in a state of stress, which changes how you respond to the situations in your life (usually responding in a way that creates more stress)
- Don’t take time to let your nervous system calm down so that the overwhelm can settle and you can get out of your stress response and into a more grounded state (from which you react differently)
- Focus on how much you have to do to just get by instead of the big picture goals that will really make a difference in your life (where you can change the conditions for stress in your life externally and internally)
When you show up in your life this way, you often MAINTAIN overwhelm in your life.
Life gets so full and busy that you can barely breathe.
And because there’s always so much more to do, you can’t imagine how you can create more time for yourself…
And thinking this creates even MORE overwhelm!
Which sucks your power away and makes you wanna grab a bottle of wine and zone out on Netflix.
You CAN change this.
You got yourself to this point. And you can get yourself out again.
Decision by small decision, you can stop feeding overwhelm and start reducing it.
- You can say no when people invite you to do things (because they will survive without you).
- You can stop coaching your kid’s team or ferrying all their friends around (because other parents are willing to help if you ask them and it will ultimately free up more time for you to have QUALITY time with your kids).
- You can schedule space in between meetings for you to stretch or nap or go for a walk (because you will show up with better focus and better ideas to your next meeting).
- You can block off 2 hours every Friday to go to a yoga class (because it calms your stress response waaaaay down and you feel at peace).
- You can prioritize your tasks to focus on the ones that contribute to your big goals and leave the laundry for another day.
You get to decide how you use your time.
Yeah, you might need to unlearn people pleasing and perfectionism.
You might need to allow some people to feel disappointed that you’re no longer doing what they want.
It might take time to restructure your schedule and retrain your clients’ expectations.
BUT it will be worth it because you’re learning how to show up in your life so that you create less overwhelm and more peace & joy – on a daily basis.
You got this.🤍
Wishing you much spaciousness on your journey.
P.S. If you want expert help to create more peace & joy in all areas of your life, I’m here. Schedule a Tea Date with me to chat.